Tag Archives: PAPER

‘Quarantined Bachelor’ Show’s a Hit in SF, Toilet Paper Instead of Roses

‘Bachelor’ Nation, meet your new fix — a couple dudes in SF started their own quarantine dating show, but they’ve nixed the roses and replaced it with a way more precious item. Two former Yelp employees in the Bay Area — Tyler Cohen and Jimmy Parenteau — already had a virtual dating show in the […]

Chris D’Elia Claims Cashier Gave Him Hoarded Toilet Paper, Big Fan

Play video content Chris D’Elia has a wild tale that’s almost too funny to believe … a local cashier hooked him up with toilet paper ’cause of his celebrity, treating perforation like precious pounds of pot. The comedian took to Instagram Saturday with his story, telling his followers that he casually strolled into an L.A.-area […]

18-Wheeler Hauling Toilet Paper Crashes in Texas, Spilling TP

An 18-wheeler hauling toilet paper across the country crashed and went up in flames on a Texas interstate … and reams of priceless rolls ended up as roadkill. The crazy scene unfolded on Interstate 20 early Wednesday morning, when the driver of the tractor-trailer lost control of the rig … flipping the truck on its […]

Quarantined Man Gets Toilet Paper Delivered Via Drone in San Fran

The coronavirus quarantines have people stocking up on supplies and causing shortages in necessities like nobody’s business. And the idea of running out of toilet paper had one San Francisco man coming up with a creative way to make sure he was prepared for the long haul during the shelter-in-place mandate scheduled until April 7. […]

Director James Gunn Using Toilet Paper with ‘Guardian’ Star’s Face

James Gunn is wiping his butt with Michael Rooker‘s face … literally. The “Guardians of The Galaxy” director says the nationwide scramble for toilet paper due to the coronavirus pandemic has forced him to go deep into his reserve stash … and he’s finally using some custom TP he originally got as a gag gift […]

Costco Says Don’t Even Think of Returning Toilet Paper

Costco is unsympathetic to all the folks who stocked up on toilet paper like they were never gonna get another sheet … because the superstore has made it clear — NO REFUNDS!!! This sign was plastered on the wall of the Costco in Pentagon City outside Washington, D.C.  Now that people have settled in, it […]

Mike Huckabee Suggests Replacing Toilet Paper with Corn on the Cob

Mike Huckabee has a solution for the toilet paper shortage being experienced across the country — wipe up with Mother Nature’s own stockpile … straight from the cornfield! The former Arkansas governor tweeted out the bizarre advice, saying people should simply turn to the crafty crop for their bathroom needs. He wrote, “Those of us […]

Watch Violinists Play Titanic Hymn in Empty Toilet Paper Aisle

Two violinists have poked fun at the apocalyptic panic-buying that has emerged in the wake of the coronavirus, allowing for a much-needed moment of levity. Bonnie von Duyke and Emer Kinsella set up their stage in an empty toilet paper aisle in Los Angeles and began serenading shoppers to the tune of “Nearer, my God, […]

Charmin & Cottonelle Address Nationwide Toilet Paper Shortages

Toilet paper brand Charmin and Cottonelle have both issued statements after customers complained about the low supply following the mass panic-buying that occurred last week. “We understand how frustrating this is, and we want you to know we take our responsibility to our consumers very seriously,” Charmin’s statement reads. “We are producing and shipping Charmin […]

Bidet Sales Skyrocket Amid Coronavirus Pandemic, Toilet Paper Shortages

Exclusive With toilet paper disappearing from stores amid the coronoavirus pandemic, folks are looking elsewhere in their quest to clean their bottoms … bidets!!! Bio Bidet, one of the top-rated bidet companies in the business, tells TMZ … sales are skyrocketing as people struggle to find TP rolls or even a square to spare. The […]